t-minus
September 24, 2007 | Mr. Squirrel,Those Pesky Kids
21 minutes and I cannot find my Exclusive Squirrel Family TV Schedule, carefully and artfully composed from culling several websites and entertainment magazines. Oh dear lord this has never happened. Which Saint do I pray to to find stuff? St. Christopher? Dude. Help! Whoever. This is IMPORTANT.
I have looked everywhere and sworn quite foul-ly (word? Yes!) at a National Geographic map, peeking out from beneath a mountain of stupid ass nature magazines.
I’m no detective (but I do watch them on tv); ergo, I’m pretty sure a crime has been committed here at Squirrel Headquarters. Someone hell bent on owning thee best guide to Fall TV has broken into our house (probably through the side door which someone (Mr. S.) left open last night) and stolen my g.d. spreadsheet.
Mr. Squirrel, not quite as upset as me…well, he’s upset at me…thinks we can handle this on the fly. “Tivo will start recording one thing, and we’ll flip through and find something else.” Oh, Mr. Ivy League’s FULL of ideas. FINE.
BUT WHAT ABOUT TOMORROW? WHAT ABOUT TUESDAY, GENIUS BOY? HUH?
Deep breathing…everything will be o.k…
rainbows and unicorns…rainbows and unicorns…
OH WAIT. Speaking of unicorns…
So next door neighbor boy spent the afternoon attempting to catch a squirrel, chipmunk or bird. I’m not sure why. Let’s not ask. Oh yes, next to my house (my property, natch), sat a makeshi(f)t chipmunk trap, constructed from a ripped butterfly net, 2 flexible/foldable frisbees and a very dirty beach towel. Needless to say, no chipmunks were trapped. Who’s got the pea-brain now?
Anyhoo, neighbor boy wanted to know which animal I wanted him to catch for me! Oh lucky! Yes. I want you to catch me my stolen tv spreadsheet. Can ya do that? No…probably because he asked before I knew a crime was committed. Nevertheless, I told him I wanted him to catch me a unicorn.
Neighbor boy: “Ok, but you have to pay for my plane ticket to Australia.”
Who’s chipping in with me?
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September 24th, 2007 at 10:06 pm, Carrisa Says:
I hope you made it through ok. I blogged my fall lineup today.. if it helps.
September 25th, 2007 at 6:41 am, Stephanie Says:
I think I may chip in for the ticket. Last week my husband told our annoying neighbbor kid to not come in our yard anymore. I was so proud of his meanness.
Come to think of it, was the little neighbor kid the one that stole your fall g d lineup????
September 25th, 2007 at 10:17 am, Hollow Squirrel » Our Lackluster Fall TV Schedule Says:
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