The Mother of All Holidays — Contest 3 Winner Revealed! Can You STAND THE EXCITEMENT?
May 8, 2008 | holidays, friends
So did you redeem yourself? Can you hold your head high today? Or will we have a repeat winner? I can barely contain myself!
1. Smitty currently practices mothering skillz on her (d) dog named Smitty. Yes, human Smitty tried in vain to have me ditch the nickname I gave her by naming her puppy Smitty. It didn’t work. Now there’s Smitty and Smitty Jr.
2. It will take all her strength to feed her baby these, which she hates: (a) bananas. People, my bff h.a.t.e.s bananas. In fact, she probably won’t read the explanation, because just the mere thought of the yellow fruit causes her to dry heave. And let me tell you that when some pranksters in college hid numerous bananas all over our dorm room, she freaked out…and that was before the Great FreakOut of All Time when, a month or so later, she discovered one of the bananas (which wasn’t discovered the first round of banana cleanup) in her unused purse — a gooey black glob of nastiness. Oh Lordy…I don’t think either of those boys have procreated, and tis probably because Smitty went all Buttafucco on their bananas. I’m not sure she knows how much kids like bananas. I mean, if not hers, her son’s friends…haha. Should be for some good times.
3. Smitty most likely will not name her son after any of her ex-boyfriends/hook-ups. Select the male name that still has a chance: (b) Jeb. Oh yes, she dated a guy named Slade…for like four minutes. But still.
4. I wonder if Smitty’s son will inherit his mom’s fear of (c) spiders. Well, she’d probably freak out at any of the things I listed (and I not-so-fondly almost causing me to careen off the road when she screamed bloody murder when there was a bee in my car), but she really detests spiders. I’m not sure how she feels about spider monkeys, however.
5. Once Smitty has little (see answer to #3), she should remember to drive safely, like she DIDN’T do in college, when she received a random $103 ticket for speeding through (c) Indiana. 103 is her unlucky number, because a few weeks later, Smitty and Clark (see #3) fell through a plate glass window and her share of the bill, well, you guessed it.
OK, so eliminating one contestant who knew some of the answers unfairly (SORRY Sweets), three of you had two questions correct, but MichelleZ came closest on the bonus question, so WOOT, a new winner! YAY MichelleZ of The Zoromski Chronicles! Email me your address, Michelle, at hollowsquirrel at gmail and I’ll get a prizetacular package out to you!
Thank you for playing! I’m posting yet another contest later today on another mom-related subject which will remain a mystery because I have to watch Top Chef first. And consume some oatmeal Teddy Grahams dipped in Nutella. You think I’m kidding. I couldn’t be MORE SERIOUS.
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May 8th, 2008 at 6:46 pm, Michelle Z Says:
Yippee!!
May 8th, 2008 at 11:34 pm, SJ Says:
Damn.
May 9th, 2008 at 4:49 pm, Kristabella Says:
My brother has this same disgust and utter hate of bananas as well. His kids LOVE them and to watch him have to peel one and give it to one of his kids is the FUNNIEST thing.
My SIL got mad at him once and told him he could make it better if he ate a banana. And he almost did. It’s like Ross almost drinking the fat on Friends.
May 21st, 2008 at 2:27 pm, Rachel Says:
So close, yet so far away.