-image-Doppleganger 2: WTF Edition

January 31, 2010 | Me,TV/movie addiction

I’m not calling the people who think I look like pretty actresses idiots. Oh heck no. They’re brilliant, insightful and clearly possess excellent eyesight.

ahem.

I forgot to mention a weird situation wherein my boss at the time came to me the day after seeing Pulp Fiction emphatically stated that I am Mia and she is me.

Wha?

No. He meant it. He said he was sitting there, watching the movie with his wife (also my boss), and that he just sat shocked, then turned to his wife and said, “Oh my God, it’s Stacy.” And his wife thought the same thing.

And no, not that I look like Uma (with either blonde or black hair), but that I act like her character, Mia. (SPOILER ALERT)

Note: I don’t snort cocaine. I’ve never OD’d on heroin and had to get slammed in the heart with a shot of adrenaline. Nope, that wasn’t me.

Maybe you’re thinking of that other blonde blogger chic. I’m not linkin’ nowhere.

And I for sure wouldn’t get my dance on with someone with hair that horrific. Ok. I lie. One desperate salsa night I had to accept a dance invitation from a mullet because there were like NO MEN and I was desperate to practice and can we just never talk about it again, because I’m serious. It was a really really bad bad super bad and not in a good way mullet.

Commence forgetting.

Ok, I should probably just go ahead and give my former bosses the benefit of the doubt that those illegal or ill-hair-advised scenes weren’t the ones that provoked their repeated insistence that I was “Mia.”

Anyway, if you should find yourself watching the flick, think of me.

Next up… a movie I hope to never see because it looks lame, and yet, I’m curious. Why? Because I heart guinea pigs. No wait.

Ok, I do. I had a guinea pig. Did you know that? WHAT? You haven’t been studying your HollowSquirrel history. People, don’t you know I may at any time throw a quiz at you? And then what will you do?

But no. My curiousity was peaked when a fabulous mom friend of mine left a hyper voicemail message that she just saw me in this movie.

Is someone suppose to be a guinea pig in this scenario? Yes. Who’s the pig? You are. You’re the pig.

Sorry, sometimes I slip into Harry and Sally mode.

Has anyone out there seen the movie and willing to admit to it? (my tip: blame your kids) Which guinea pig am I and why? One page, double-spaced, one inch margins. I’m going to make my “friend” answer this question in the comments section.

I’m pretty sure the pig is a spaz.

-image-Doppleganger!? I Wish!

January 29, 2010 | Deep Thoughts Friday,Me,TV/movie addiction

If you’re on Facebook, you may have noticed that some people chose to participate in Doppleganger week — where you post as your profile picture the celebrity others tell you you resemble.

I thought I’d post the incomparable Jennie Garth since a resemblance was cited just this year Had I been linked to someone less attractive, I might not have participated. But check her out. Hot mama!

The Jennie Garth comment cracked me up even more since I own a sweater that Kelly Taylor once sported on 90210 (the first time).

After that episode, my friend Poodle always referred to the black and white cardigan as “The Kelly Taylor sweater,” and I haven’t been able to part with it even though I’ve gained so much weight that the once hip-grazing hem now hovers around my spare tire.

I’m flattered with the association, but really? I’m guessing it’s because both Jennie and I have shoulder length blonde hair.

This past fall, my neighbor dropped by and was shocked at how I looked “exactly like Katherine Heigl.” Ha! I wish.

I think it was the sweater again. No, not that sweater.

It was a different sweater which I can’t even wear anymore because I shrank the bitch in the wash. Not that I’m bitter.

So my neighbor swore I looked like Izzy…maybe it was the sweater, or the blonde hair, or maybe it was because she walked in on me having sex with a ghost. I dunno…she avoids me now.

I’ve loved seeing the other celebrities that my friends look like. A close childhood friend commented that her friend’s daughter said she looked like Kimmy Gibbler from Full House. I didn’t regularly watch the show, but I knew that wasn’t a good pick. After checking out Kimmy, I realize my friend’s friend’s daughter (follow me, people) is on crack. Good luck with that.

Of course, when I first read the comment, I thought she was talking about that annoying little red-headed neighbor girl with half a head of bangs on Small Wonder. You see her, peeking out behind the dad on the left. Poor girl. I bet she hates the internet. And people like me.

Anyway, my favorite revelation was that of my mom. Here’s what she writes:

I stopped getting perms when some little kid I was examining told his mom I looked like the lady on Murder She Wrote – mind you I was only in my 40′s. Kids also let you know if your teeth are yellow…but that is another story.

Hilarity, thy name is my old detective/mystery author mom.

So who do you look like, or should I say, people tell you you look like?

-image-I call that exercise.

I'm an Idiot,random randomness

I just chased our recycling bins down the street as the wind and icy patches mocked me and my faux moonboots.

The only other exercise I’m getting these days is breastfeeding. Still.

-image-Where’s the Love, Montana? NoDak?

friends

If you, lovely reader, know people in these states, can you ask them to send some cyberlove to my friend, Georgia? She’s trying to get commenters/supporters from every state, and considering two scientists in Antarctica showed some support, I think we can find some action in Montana and North Dakota!

What about Burkina Faso? Madagascar? Romania? Let’s spread the love!

Thanks for any help!

-image-She’s on my mind, too.

January 24, 2010 | friends

Meet Georgia. She’s the eldest daughter of my friend and fellow blogger (whose site I’m not linking to unless she tells me it’s ok). This beautiful 10 year old was recently diagnosed with Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia (ALL), and I would love it if you could leave her a supportive comment and keep her in your thoughts.

Read through her blog to learn more about her treatment, plan o’ attack and all of the love surrounding her, including her adorable little sister/nurse, Ivy. Send her an email, and Team Peachy Keen will send you an orangetastic support bracelet — I’ll be sporting mine soon! Orange is the new everything, after all.

If I wasn’t afraid my sweet friend wouldn’t click her smart way over to my site, I’d tell you all what I think of cancer. It’s not pretty. I have nothing nice to say about it.

What I do have say about Georgia and her family and their strength is all good. They surround themselves with hope and positivity and love, and that’s what I’m focusing on, and I hope you do, too. Maybe you could share some encouraging words with them? Thank you.

-image-Good Idea/Bad Idea

January 19, 2010 | Mr. Squirrel,random randomness,the homestead,TV/movie addiction,Uncategorized

* Instead of baking all of the chocolate chip cookie dough at once, Mr. Squirrel spread a half inch layer on the bottom of some tupperware and froze it. Then he cut out pieces for us to eat after the kids go to bed. Dangerously good.

* While I sat in stunned, but entertained, silence during Hoarders last night, Mr. Squirrel came up from working on the basement and said, “have you heard about that new show, Insulators?” So I had to go and help him. I think you know how I feel about our home improvement projects.

* For our steak fajitas tonight, I added a bit of cumin to the recipe. Then some digestion happened, and Mr. Squirrel called me anusin. Oh yes, I will be the sixth spice girl. Trust me, you don’t want front row tickets to that show.

-image-The Nugg: An Explanation

January 16, 2010 | Confessional,The Nugget

Lookee left, if you’d be so kind. That’s The Nugget.

I feel bad, and have felt much shame for months and months now, because if you’re a long time reader or have gone through the archives, you probably noticed that Nugget doesn’t get as much photo time as his big brother, Jojo.

Many second born kids end up with fewer pictures, in the house and archives, so I realize this isn’t breaking news. And in fact, we do take a ridiculous amount of pictures of the little guy. I just haven’t been posting them.

And now I will tell you why.

My friends, back around The Nugget’s first birthday something happened. Something bad.

That’s right…Nugget received a hideous haircut.

There’s no one to blame here (um, lie. I completely blame the barber. I think his name was Pure Evil.).

It was so bad that I couldn’t even post a picture to prove the extent of its sheer awfulness.

I thought all was going well… Nugget wasn’t whining, the back and sides were looking great — no shelf in the back, I thought the barber and I were understanding one another.

Seriously, it was all going so well and then in 0.2 seconds, he took two large snip snips across my baby’s forehead like he was trying to beat some unseen clock. WTF dude?

My baby went from an almost perfect first haircut to looking reeediculous.

No, really. It was that bad. A few people said he looked like a little monk or friar. Oh good.

I tried the Lick and Push on what was left of his bangs, but I could barely angle them. I almost used product.

THAT’S how bad it was.

Since then, we’ve taken him to another location for two pretty decent haircuts. I realize my baby has my husband’s hair, so a bumpy road he will have. I just didn’t want it to start so young.

Please learn from our hair tragedy — before they touch a hair on your precious baby’s head, cover all areas of the head within your consultation, especially the precious forehead/bang area.

Cute and Cuter

-image-$1.00! $1.00!

January 15, 2010 | random randomness

Does anyone else here feel like they’re spinning the Big Wheel when they’re closing the back hatch of a minivan?

-image-What is it with Chefs?

January 14, 2010 | TV/movie addiction

A few years ago, had someone told me that I’d be addicted to cooking competition shows, I’d have laughed. Ha! Lame. But here I am, completely enthralled with them.

And that is really all I need to say.

-image-My Big Idea: Mail-away Dry Cleaning

January 13, 2010 | Showcase of Brilliant Ideas

Listen up, Donnie Deutsch or whatever your name is. You know your name. You know I’m looking at you.

I want a mail-away dry cleaning service. Who wants to open one up for me and send me some postage-paid envelopes? Ok, because seriously.

I took two thin wool sweaters, one rayon dress and one cotton lined dress to get dry cleaned at the place down the block, and then I shat an orange at the price.

Are you ready to be robbed of all sanity?

Ok then. Sit down.

Forty-seven U.S. dollars. Forty-seven.

$47.00.

What. The. What?

Sorry boys. No college for you. But at least the stains are out of mommy’s sweaters.